Feb
19
2012

love yourself more in an non selfish way

do you love yourself? most ppl would agree that they love themself, do you really? love yourself is not just treat yourself vacation once a year, or buy yourself a cup of coffee from starbucks, or go to a fansy expensive restaurant once awhile. and it certainly is not take from others and give to yourself what you don't deserve. love yourself is not eating out all the time with your favorite fast food or sitting at home lazy watching TV or get on the internet.

love yourself means to really love yourself spiritually. when others talk down on you at work, at home or at school, don't agree with them and go home and start yelling at yourself. when others ask you to do something you don't want to do, maybe it's because you're tired or you don't have time or you don't think it's the right thing to do; just don't do it. learn to say "no". love yourself also could be that if your parents want you to study a major that you don't want in college, you should tell them what you really want. if your children wants you to give them more allowance but your budget is tight this month, you should tell them. you might think that by pleasing others such as your parents, your boss, or your children is loving yourself, but it's not. when you please others too much and they don't notice or don't appreciate you, you just waste your time doing something you really don't want to do. and when those ppl don't even appreciate you or treat you with respect, you felt hurt and then you start blaming yourself. instead of confronting them and tell them "no". you lock yourself in your own blaming world and you start hating yourself and be really depress.

when you go to the mall with your friends, if you want to eat pizza but your friends wants Chinese food, do you let them choose what you want to eat? when you want to buy something in the store, but they told you not to buy it, do you let them choose what you like? when your boyfriend/girlfriend told you how you should spend your free time, do you let them just walk all over you and give no time for yourself. learn to say "no", learn to disappear once a while, learn to go to your own comfort zone, learn to have your own space, learn to pick the food/stuff you really want to buy.

of course love yourself in a non selfish way, you can't hurt others by doing 100% what you want, compromise, communicate, talk with the other person. maybe this week do whatever you want, and next week do whatever the other person want. don't go 90% or 10% try 50/50.

About the author

Los angeles is great.  It has very diverse community and I love shopping, eating out and visiting new places.

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